Iraqi soccer team toast of Olympics

ATHENS, Greece - Word is, President Bush is considering an impromptu visit to the Summer Games.

Unless he wants to blow his shot at re-election, he should not be seen in public with the U.S. men's basketball team.

``We got nobody on our side,'' Team USA's Shawn Marion said. ``Referees, fans, reporters, nobody.''

It's true. Even shocking numbers of Americans want these Americans to lose. Even the president is smart enough to understand this, which is why he's rumored to be pondering a show of support for the real Olympic dream team.

That would be the Iraqi soccer team, which would advance to the finals with a victory Tuesday night.

``I didn't vote for him (anyway),'' Team USA's Richard Jefferson said when told Bush had suddenly become a huge soccer fan.

So, welcome to another strange political twist at the Summer Olympics. Our disgraced hoops outfit has become the Scream Team, the team everybody wants to lose. The Iraqi men have become the toast of Greece and the global media.

It is merely a coincidence that their respective countries happen to be at war, right?

``The other night, a guy leaned over the balcony and asked us where we were from,'' said Eric McMahon, a members of the Suns Zoo Crew providing in-game entertainment at the Olympic basketball venue. ``We told him we were from Phoenix, from the United States. He swore at us and asked what the hell we were doing in Iraq.''

That little exchange aside, this tale of two countries is truly a happenstance. And with both stories, not all is what it seems.

As they've progressed through the tournament, the Iraqi soccer players have become increasingly angry with our president. They are blasting Bush for his latest campaign ad, one that ties Iraq's success in Athens to the benevolent work of American freedom fighters.

The ad shows the Iraqi flag and the Afghanistan flag, claiming that because of the Bush administration, there are two fewer terrorist regimes at the Summer Olympics. In response, members of the Iraqi team have decried Bush's foreign policy.

This defiance makes them even more lovable on the global stage, playing right into the hands of the anti-American sentiment that had faded into the background here in Greece. After all, they are from a poor, war-torn country and needed a miracle just to qualify for Athens. They had to bus to Jordan to stage home games because opponents would not play on Iraqi soil, citing a general concern of stray bullets.

Poor guys.

Problem is, this is no Cinderella story. Iraq has long produced excellent soccer players. Smart ones, too, and many of them stopped playing when Saddam Hussein's son, Odai, would routinely tear their fingernails out for missing a penalty kick. With Odai and his taste for torture overseeing the soccer program, many of the top athletes reportedly fled to Europe.

So, on some level, the removal of the Hussein regime has everything to do with Iraq's success. Problem is, these players can't be heroes back home, like they are now, if they show any gratitude to the American infidels rolling in with tanks.

Meanwhile, Allen Iverson is claiming that he and his teammates are loathed simply because of the same three letters across the front of their uniform: USA. That is a gross generalization, and overseas, it's mostly the age-old quest to slay a giant.

Yet back in the United States, it's a byproduct of a growing disgust with the NBA. It's a league where the three-point line has become the arc enemy. It's a league all about individual play, style points and street credibility.

In their two losses, Team USA looked most impressive when desperate, when fighting for every loose ball. Clearly, the team has the depth and raw talent to do this for the duration of a 40-minute game. Players won't because they have to look cool.

``Look, everyone on that U.S. team is the man on their (NBA) team,'' said Dallas Mavericks assistant coach and Lithuania basketball consultant Donn Nelson. ``They're not used to setting screens, doing the dirty work. They're used to being the recipients of that stuff.''

Folks in America notice that stuff. They also notice when a team with nearly $700 million in guaranteed contracts gets burned by a Lithuanian sharpshooter, Sarunas Jasikevicius, who can't get a job in the NBA.

As American viewers can now see, European basketball is highly regimented, with long practices dedicated to fundamentals. The soul of the NBA is one-on-one. Before a game against Greece, Team USA practiced dunks and circus shots. On the other side of the court, the Greeks were doing calisthenics.

It must be said that Team USA had a good day on Monday, smoking Angola. But here is Angelo Victoriano, a member of that infamous Angolan team in 1992, the one that discovered the power of Charles Barkley's elbow.

``You can't compare today to the Dream Team of 1992,'' Victoriano said. ``They were much better then. That was the only true Dream Team the U.S. has ever had.''

Alas, it's true. Team USA doesn't have many friends these days. Not in Athens, where they are the hunted and the Iraqis are the heroes. Not even at home, where the hope is that an Olympic loss would change the tone of NBA basketball.

``The records go out the door now,'' LeBron James said. ``If our best team shows up, we're going to win the gold.''

Sorry, even that may not guarantee a visit with the president.

Iraqi soccer team toast of Olympics

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